There are 5 principles to success according to the NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) framework.
Step 1: Know your outcome
Step 2: Have sensory acuity
Step 3: Operate from a psychology of excellence
Step 4: Have behavioural flexibility
Step 5: Take action
Since I limit this blog to a 3-4 minute read, we will cover the first two today and the remainder in next weeks blog.
How often have you been in a meeting that was a waste of time? Research shows that 54% of executives consider meetings a waste of group and individual time, impacting productivity, collaboration and job satisfaction. One of the common reasons for ineffective meetings is the lack of a clear objective. This is often a function of not distributing an agenda before the meeting.
In order to be successful, it helps if we know what we are trying to achieve. If you are designing a new website or writing your first best seller, you will have a wire frame or some form of structure in place before starting the work. This structure will include a series of steps, often with a timeline, which lead you to your objective. You can’t hit a target if you don’t have one so take time to consider what your objective is, how it will look, what you will feel when you achieve it; and then plan the steps necessary to arrive at that destination. That is step 1.
Step 2 is to have sensory acuity. This is a fancy way of saying be aware of where you are in the process of achieving your objective.
Sensory Acuity is about awareness. Awareness of your position and feelings, awareness about how others are responding to you. I learnt this the hard way many years ago..
The previous head of HR at one of my clients had resigned and her #2 was promoted to the top job. I had met the new head a number of times and there was absolutely no issues between us. We didn’t know each other well but we got on fine. Indeed, when we met to discuss our continued partnership, the opening salvo was friendly and with good energy.
At that meeting in Hong Kong was a young associate whom I had met in the clients London office some months earlier. I was surprised to see him there and since he was new to Hong Kong and a fellow Brit, we connected and started discussing all the wonderful things Hong Kong had to offer.
This was my fatal mistake and I should have known better. For approximately 60 seconds the dialogue with the associate was in line with the initial positive ambience of the meeting. However, on a dime that turned.
I noticed a change in facial expression of the new HR head; her eyes looked down, she shifted her seating position and folded her arms (a defensive/closed body position). Her mouth pursed. She was clearly annoyed that the focus of attention was with the associate and not the important person in the room, ie her! I remember this as if it was yesterday. Before that meeting I had been training the client regularly for 4 years. I never did another piece of business with them for as long as long as she remained in charge.
My sensory acuity had badly let me down. Yes, I eventually noticed some signs and did all I could to redirect my attention and repair the damage I had done, but it was too late. I should have been alert to this risk far before. I should have been observing for any slight shift in tone of voice, facial expression or body language that would give me advance notice of a pending shift in attitude. Something as inconsequential as a single long breath could have been a warning sign if I had picked it up.
My failure in sensory acuity was also present within my own behaviour. I never stopped to consider whether I was making an error. A basic analysis of the situation would dictate that I should be focusing on the HR head and not the associate. Needless to say, I have never made this mistake again!
So in summary, step 2 in the 5 principles for success requires us to have heightened awareness of whether we are on track to achieve our goals. We need to monitor ourselves and others, and critically review where we are in any given process. If we are not achieving the required steps/timeline, our sensory acuity should alert us to this so we can take the required steps to get back on track. Applying this methodology to any meeting or communication allows greater control over outcomes and ultimately results in more successful interactions with your counterparts.
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